By Kristi Antley
There is no magic recipe for success when it comes to romance. Even when you think you have found “your person”, longevity and bliss aren’t promised. While we all have basic needs such as affection, security, companionship, and acceptance, how those needs are recognized, met, and maintained can vary from individual to individual. Although there are no easy solutions, genies in a bottle, or guarantees in the realm of love, studies prove that the most solid relationships are built primarily on friendship, mutual respect, patience, and open communication. These components must be evident along with daily, intentional effort from both parties to sustain a healthy, permanent relationship.
Friendship came first for Lexington’s lifelong sweethearts, Linda and Steve Cruea. Originally from Wisconsin, Linda’s family relocated several times until they settled in Ohio. On a warm, sunny day in 1953, fate allowed Linda and Steve’s paths to cross on a train at the Cincinnati Zoo. Linda’s recollection of that day is a little fuzzy as she was only 5 years old, but she says the connection with Steve (and his family) was instant. “We were only a few months apart in age, we had a lot in common with each other, and we became close friends almost immediately.”
The youngsters had no idea that they would be “thick as thieves” throughout their adolescent years, all the way into adulthood.
As the years passed, Steve and Linda became romantically attracted to each other at the beginning of their junior year of high school. It is often true that opposites attract–Linda was academic, shy, structured, and responsible by nature; Steve was more social, flexible, charismatic, and spontaneous. Linda remarks, “I remember sitting at a table with my girlfriends after a football game when Steve walked up and began talking. As I listened to him, it was a defining moment in my mind–he was a man that I wanted to get to know much better.” They began dating exclusively during their senior year, attending the prom and many other fun outings and activities together. “Our families knew each other very well and would occasionally take us square dancing,” remarks Linda.
After graduation, Steve furthered his education in Florida while Linda attended college in Ohio. Although they were separated geographically, the lovebirds knew that they had something special together and were eager to see where it would take them. Steve eventually quit school and moved back to Ohio where he and Linda continued to develop and strengthen their bond. When the news arrived that Steve was going to be drafted and stationed in Vietnam, the young, vibrant couple eloped to Kentucky where they had a small, impromptu chapel wedding before his departure.
During Steve’s tour of duty, Linda continued her education and the lovers communicated verbally as often as possible. Linda was not fond of writing letters, and public/residential phones had not yet been introduced; they talked via live radio switchboard operators. Of course, their phone calls were not private, and the parties had to take turns talking and pausing as the signals were intermittently transmitted. Steve received a brief period of R&R during this time, and Linda was excited to have the opportunity to spend time with him in Hawaii. She soon finished college and Steve was dismissed early from his military position to finish his accounting degree in Ohio.
The couple began building their own family in 1970. Digital ultrasound technology was not yet available at that time, and they were ecstatic to welcome their beautiful daughter into the world. The precious Cruea clan was thriving; 2 handsome sons would complete the family during the next 5-7 years. Linda worked part-time utilizing her marketing degree while taking care of the children. Steve continued to work while he attended school and secured several jobs in various capacities. He was a very smart, distinguished, attractive man who enjoyed talking to people, collaborating, and helping others as much as possible. Linda recalls that one of his most interesting positions was being the night auditor for a prestigious hotel in Dayton where he had the opportunity of meeting several celebrities and local dignitaries.
As Steve completed his secondary education he moved “up the ladder,” making huge advancements professionally, which required relocating the family several times. Eventually, his upper management position with Georgia Pacific brought them to South Carolina, where they made Lexington their permanent home. “It was a much different town at that time,” Linda remembers. “Apartments did not exist in Lexington then, so we rented until we were able to build a house in 1998.” The couple was pleased to have been able to raise their children and grandchildren in such a positive, nurturing, and supportive community.
Being married to the same person for 46 years is a huge accomplishment; each day delivers both challenges and triumphs. Sadly, Steve lost a battle against cancer in 2016. Linda was by his side every step of the way, caring and giving all that she could to make his last moments as special as possible. He made a promise to her that he would “be there” for her birthday in late August so that she would not be alone. As the date approached, Steve was very weak and frail but lived until midnight on Linda’s birthday.
When asked what advice she would offer new couples, Linda explains, “You must work to overcome your differences and settle daily issues without fighting. Perseverance, forgiveness, and communication are of utmost importance,” she continues. “You must think of the other person first, be patient, and be flexible. We NEVER considered divorce as an option.”
