By: Rodman Frost

It’s 2025, and kids are online endlessly. It’s their world—one where they learn, play, socialize, and even shop. But buried beneath the shiny surface of media reels and gaming chats lies a dark side. The bullies. The scams. The dangers. Here’s the thing: You can’t shut the door. You can’t put the genie back in the bottle. But you can guard the gates. So, how do we keep our youth safe without confining them to a wi-fi proof bubble? Can we manage them without smothering them?

Lisa Kejr with Lighthouse for Life, an organization dedicated to eradicating human trafficking, explains: “I work for an organization that fights sex trafficking and the unfortunate reality is that traffickers are choosing to use social media and technology as their gateway of choice to connect with thousands of vulnerable, innocent individuals and lure them into a life of bondage. The best way to protect our youth is by being aware of how they are using their technology, setting clear boundaries for its use, and investing in them through time and conversations that let them know that they can share with you about anything.”

Statistics don’t lie. According to a 2020 study by the National Cyber Security Alliance 70% of kids aged 12 to 17 have experienced at least some form of online harassment. That’s nearly three-quarters of teens facing real-time, digital stress and social anxiety, and the situation isn’t improving. In fact, the average age of a child experiencing their first cyberbullying incident has dropped to 8 years old. Kids aren’t just on social media. They’re on everything—games, chats, forums, apps—and more and more often they’re doing it unsupervised. Their digital lives are often a hidden world. Without the right tools and strategies, it’s easy to let your guard down, only to realize too late that your child has slipped through the cracks.

Lay Down the Law: Set the Rules Early

Boundaries must be set, and we’re not referring to curfews. It all begins with that no-nonsense conversation—about trust, responsibility, and what not to share online. Sure, they might roll their eyes. They’ll groan, maybe even pull the classic “You don’t get it” line. But they need it. Set boundaries that make sense and are enforceable. How much screen time? What apps are off-limits? What kind of behavior crosses the line? This isn’t just about limiting access; it’s about giving them a map, one that’s clearly marked with “danger zones.” And let’s face it: The sooner you set these rules, the better. Because once they’re on the apps, there’s no taking back that first post. The internet is forever.

Parental Controls: Your Digital Fence

You’ve got the rules, now put up some fences. Parental controls are your first line of defense—because let’s be real, you can’t be watching their every move 24/7. With the sheer amount of apps and websites out there, you need tools that do the heavy lifting. Whether it’s screen time management, blocking inappropriate content, or tracking their browsing habits, parental controls give you the power to step in when things get dicey. Also—privacy settings. This can’t be said enough. Every major platform allows you to lock down your kid’s account to private mode, limiting who can see their posts, comment, or send messages. This is a no-brainer.

Then, there’s the big guns: third-party apps that constantly monitor everything—messages, social posts, online interactions—and raise red flags when something’s up. They’ll even tell you if your child’s talking to someone inappropriate for their age, intellect, or maturity. Let’s face it, if your 12-year-old is texting someone they met in a random chat room, you’re probably not going to find out unless you’ve got these tools in place. But remember, parental controls aren’t a crutch. They’re a supplement—you still need to have those open, often awkward conversations.

Protecting Their Own Privacy

You wouldn’t let a stranger wander into your house and poke around your things. The same goes for the internet. Teach your child what they shouldn’t be sharing—location, personal information, pictures, passwords, and all other private information. They need to know that everything they put online is a breadcrumb that leads back to them. Every post, every chat, every comment, every like—it matters.

But how do you teach them? Start by explaining the concept of a “digital footprint” and how, even if something feels fleeting or private, it’s never really gone. If they understand that there’s no such thing as complete privacy, they’ll be more careful about what they post. You don’t have to scare them—but help them understand the potential consequences. Even into adulthood, their social media posts matter.

Create a Tech Contract

A little accountability goes a long way. Instead of imposing a “screen time” rule that feels like you’re constantly butting heads, why not create a family tech contract? This is an agreement—a handshake—that clearly lays out both their responsibilities and yours. When can they use their devices? How long? And more importantly, what are the consequences if they break the rules? This approach keeps them engaged in the process, and you’re laying out the ground rules right from the start. It becomes less about punishment and more about mutual understanding. The cool part? You can revise it as they grow. What might be acceptable at age 10 might not fly when they’re 14. Keep evolving the rules and make sure they’re part of the discussion. After all, they’re the ones logging the hours.

Maintain Open Communication

Ah, social media—the wild frontier. It’s where your kid might make a viral reel or land a virtual call with a friend across the world. But here’s the truth: it’s also where things get weird. Strangers can “slide” into DMs (direct messages). They can comment on photos and even manipulate situations without you knowing. Here’s the trick: open communication.

Make social media a family affair. If they want to join a platform, make it a point to join them. Have them show you their profile, what they’re posting, and who they’re talking to. However, YOU predominantly set the example in this case; if a glowing screen consumes your attention on a regular basis when you are with them, they aren’t going to be as likely to take your suggestions seriously. This doesn’t need to be invasive; it’s about showing interest and setting clear guidelines. Of course, there is no reason to monitor every single interaction, but when they’re open they’re less likely to stumble into dangerous territory because of a lack of awareness and knowledge.

Cyberbullying

It’s everywhere, and it’s ugly. Over 1 in 5 teens report being bullied online, according to Cyberbullying Research Center data. And it’s not just something that happens to other kids. It could be happening to your child right now, under your nose, or your child could be involved in taunting other children. Misery loves company, and unfortunately most young people don’t want to miss the bandwagon, instantly escalating a potentially dangerous situation.

That’s why you need to create a space where they feel comfortable talking about it without shame or fear of consequences. Knowing that when they talk with you about these types of situations without criticism, you open the door for them to share what’s going on in their digital world. It’s your chance to step in early before things spiral.

Protection vs. Control

At the end of the day the goal is balance. You’re not locking them in a digital cage, but you’re not letting them wander unsupervised through a minefield either. It’s about protecting their innocence while allowing them to grow, learn, and have fun. The internet isn’t going anywhere and neither are the dangers. It’s about equipping them with the right tools to handle it, and showing them they’ve got a safety net.

So, yes, the stakes are high. But with the right rules, tools, and conversations, you can make sure your child’s online life remains a safe, enriching experience. Stay vigilant. Stay involved. And above all, stay present.